Spinning in Circles {{Heatherflower}}

Cloudpaw

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Cloudpaw, the moment he was away from the area of moonpool took off across the moor, his paws pounding on the ground as he bounded through he tall grass. He didn't know why, but he felt like running. It seemed to help get away from all the troubles that had suddenly seemed to swamp him in one night. The new warning about the clans, the raspy voice, Tinypaw completely losing telling them they had to rid cats that weren't pure blood....it was too much for the young tom to take at one time. As he ran pain filled his heart as he remember his mom's beautiful face. She had been so young when she had been killed. He had never really gotten to know her. and now the friends he had made, that made that pain go away, they were in danger.
'Why did this have to happen now?' he though as he slowly slowed down as he realized where be was. He had never left the stream that flowed from moonpool. As he slowed down with his chest heaving he slowly walked over to the softly gurgling stream and looked into the clear water. He could easily see his white reflection looking back at him. Confusion and pain were in his eyes as well as fear. But why fear? Was he scared for himself? No, he wasn't. One cats came to mind.
Snowpaw... he didn't know why, but she did. Recently it had been happening more. AS he sat down he could easily recall everything about the young she cat. Her fur was pure white, white than his or Whiteheart's. Her eyes were a soft icy blue, but at the same time they held a gentle kindness in them that he felt like he could trust. Why did she have to be so dad-gum cute?!
"you're a medicine cat, cloudpaw. You can't fall in love. Period end of story. You need to forget her." he muttered kicking dirt into the water. As he watched the dirt slowly float down the river he let out a long sigh. He slowly looked up at the morning sky and took in the last few stars.
'Starclan wanted me to do this for some reason. And I'm going to find that reason.' he swore in his head. But he knew he was going to need help. right now he needed Heatherflower.
As if summoned the wind picked up and he caught her familiar scent drifting toward him. He turned slightly and looked at the calico she-cat. She looked worried and a little irritated. good, he wasn't the only one fed up with Tinypaw.[/center]

Show me the meaning of being lonely
Is this the feeling I need to walk with
Tell me why, I can’t be there where you are
There’s something missing in my heart.

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A Heatherflower padded away from Moonpool, she felt a chill run down her spine, and it wasn't from the cool morning air. It was from the words Tinypaw, medicine cat apprentice of ShadowClan, had spoke on that sacred ground. Heatherflower was stunned at how that apprentice could even think that StarClan would wish for them to persecute the ones who did not believe, or were not of pure clan blood. Heatherflower didn't believe Tinypaw knew what would happen if she did that. She would kill some of the greatest warriors and leaders, deputies, and... medicine cats... the clan had with them.

The WindClan medicine cat cat knew she wasn't the only one who felt that way about Tinypaw. She had seen the look on Cloudpaw's face, she had heard the words he had spoken. Her young apprentice had much more sense than that older apprentice did! Heatherflower was certain. Heatherflower hadn't hesitated when Cloudpaw wordlessly asked to leave. Now she had to locate him, in case he hadn't gone back to camp.

It didn't take but a moment to pick up his fresh scent when she left the small valley that housed Moonpool. She walked slowly as she followed it. Scared for what StarClan had in mind for them. Or if StarClan even had control over what would happen next. The more she thought about it, the more she got upset! How dare that apprentice speak such things! She didn't even seem to realize that the other medicine cats had gotten an important message from StarClan! So caught up in her own glory, that's what Tinypaw was. Heatherflower was just thankful Crystalmoon appeared to have received StarClan's true message.

StarClan have pity on Crystalmoon...I would hate to have an apprentice like that. I'm very thankful I have Cloudpaw. Heatherflower felt a smile tug at her lips. Her poor apprentice, to experience so much in one night. She hope it wouldn't scare him away from being her apprentice.

As she padded through the bracken she came upon her white apprentice, who had caught her scent. He was by the stream that lead from Moonpool. She knew that look on his face. He was upset. But before she could say anything a fit of coughing took over. It last for a couple of seconds and Heatherflower shook her head apologetically. "Sorry about that, had something in my throat. Well Cloudpaw, what did you think of you first meeting?" She didn't expect to hear him say much good about it.

Cloudpaw

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cloudpaw just looked at his mentor for the longest time almost trying to form the words in his mouth. He knew he couldn't tell her about his dream, but he just wanted to shout it out loud. He didn't see why he couldn't. it was just he and his mentor. Why did all the Medicine cat rules have to be so strict?
finally he found the words he wanted. he flicked his ears slightly and wrapped his tail around his paws.
"I was sort of hoping for a little happier dream, but apparently no one got that." he mewed softly, looking at Heatherflower with blue eyes. "But i was glad about one part. I know my mom's in starclan. and she's gladly welcomed there."
He felt he could share that with heatherflower, although a tug pulled at his heart. He didn't wanted to admit it, but at teat moment he wanted to talk to his mom more than anything. He knew Heatherflower cared about him, but would she understand completely. On top of that could he tell her everything that he was going through?
As he sat there and looked up at the morning shy he caught one cloud that looked like a cat face.
"Heatehrflower, why can't medicine cats fall in love? I mean their cat's just like everyone else. What's so wrong about it?" he asked softly looking back at his mentor. He hadn't meant to talk about this.
'You stupid tom. She's going to think something's going on now and she'll never let you near the Riverclan boarder again. Nice going.' he scolded silently. okay he really needed to stop talking to himself in his head. It was starting to freak him out.
As he sat there waiting for Heatherflowers reply, he could help but feel a cold dread. He was about to hear something he probably didn't want to hear. not if it meant keeping him away from Snowpaw....WHAT WAS HE SAYING?![/center]

Show me the meaning of being lonely
Is this the feeling I need to walk with
Tell me why, I can’t be there where you are
There’s something missing in my heart.

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"Well, they are normally much more happier than tonights meeting was." Heatherflower chuckled. It seemed like a dead chuckle. Forced out because her thoughts were on something else. They were on what StarClan had shared with them. It was about the message. The dream. What was StarClan warning them about? Could it be about Tinypaw?

But then Cloudpaw asked a question she was not prepared for. Why..why can't medicine cats fall in love? Heatherflower was caught off guard and it took a moment for her to get her bearings. Heatherflower looked at her apprentice up and down as if he was some other cats. She had never asked that question, she had just naturally known the answer. But why was Cloudpaw asking it?

"Cloudpaw...have you fallen in love with some one?" she dared to ask. She wanted to get a straight answer from him. "And don't you dare lie to me, I want the truth."

Cloudpaw

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Cloudpaw looked at Heatherflower unsure of how to answer her. If he told her the truth she would never let him become medicine cat. But he didn't want to lie to her. He'd have to live with the guilt even if she believed him. Oh what was he going to do.
'I don't even know if Snowpaw likes me or not, but i know i like her. If it's just a feeling of like why does it matter?' he thought, 'It's liking someone...i'm not in love...'
Cloudpaw wrapped his tails around his paws and looked at his mentor straight in the eyes. She could see the worry in them and knew he couldn't lie to her.
"No. I haven't." he mewed firmly. Technically he hadn't. not yet. "i just remember the elders talking about Leafpool and Ravenfeather and i always wondered why..."
That could easily cover him up and possibly get him the answer he wanted. And he hadn't lied completely. He wasn't in love that he knew of. So if he didn't know, he couldn't lie about it. Now could he?[/center]

Show me the meaning of being lonely
Is this the feeling I need to walk with
Tell me why, I can’t be there where you are
There’s something missing in my heart.

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Heatherflower looked at her apprentice, worried and a little unconvinced. But his explanation was logical. The elders loved to talk about the medicine cat and her lover. That story had once been the she-cats favorite but now she didn't like the story all that much. Leafpool had never been a good medicine because of that.

Heatherflower took a deep breath and began the explanation. "Cloudpaw, tonight you took a vow, a vow that can be easily broken but can have dire consequences for your clan if you do. When you took that vow you not only promised to take care of your clan, you promised to give yourself entirely to your clan. It is our duty as medicine cats to take care of our clan. Our Clan is our family and if medicine cats were allowed to have mates, then we would not be focus entirely on our clan. If ever there was a battle, you were the medicine cat, and you hate a mate and kits. Which would you be more quick to look at - your mate who had a bleeding shoulder, or a warrior who was dying? As a medicine cat it would be the injured warrior, but as a mate it would have been your mate. Even if the cat would die if you didn't look at him immediately it would be your mate. Just to make sure she was alright."

Heatherflower gave an encouraging smile to Cloudpaw "The life of a medicine cat is not easy. It's an on going trial and will never end. You will constantly be tested and any moment you might hold the life of a cat in your paws." She looked serious as she asked Cloudpaw once more "Are you sure you wish to be a medicine cat?"

Cloudpaw

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cloudpaw listened quiet as Heatherflower explained. He understood completely. Yes he would have checked on his mate first which could have cost a cat it's life. he knew he'd be faced with that, but he just hoped it wasn't soon.
When Heatherflower asked the last question he looked at her startled.
"Yes. this is the biggest thing in the world to me. i would do anything to be a medicine cat." he mewed firmly. That defiantly wasn't a lie. It wasn't that he hated fighting and hunting, but herbs came easily to him. He liked taking care of other cats. It was what he was meant to do.
"i know i may seem a little distant and dodgy about things. But i want to do this Heatherflower. I really do." he mewed softly looking at her.
From now on he was going to work hard to be the best medicine cat possible. He would forget Snowpaw. He would focus on getting this dream figured out. He had to prove to Hetherflower and everyone else he was to be the next Windclan medicine cat.[/center]

Show me the meaning of being lonely
Is this the feeling I need to walk with
Tell me why, I can’t be there where you are
There’s something missing in my heart.

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Heatherflower gave a small smile as Cloudpaw replied. "I just want to be sure that you are positive this is the path you want to take. This is not an easy life. You have a large responsibility with this job. You will see a lot of pain and hurt and maybe even have to live knowing a cat died because you couldn't help them."

Heatherflower shook her head "But that is something to worry about when the time comes. Come on, Cloudpaw. I want to get a few herbs while we're out on our way back to camp." Although Heatherflower didn't voice it, the message from StarClan worried her. If something bad was going to happen she wanted to be prepared for the worse.

She began to lead the way toward camp. Distracted by her thoughts she said "Just get whatever herbs you find. And if you spot any cobwebs get those too."

Cloudpaw

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Cloudpaw smiled slightly and nodded at his mentor. She had a right to make sure. He had been rather dodgy lately. As he slowly padded away from the river following his mentor he slowly sniffed the air for herbs. For a while he didn't catch anything but then several herbs hit him at once.
Yarrow, Juniper, Thyme...
Like usual the herbs' names came to him easily...it was what they were used for was what he was going to have to learn. He remembered his little rhyme that went with yarrow
Leaves kill disease while roots give the boot.
Well really that hadn't been right, but that's how he was going o remember it.
"Heatehrflower, i think their's some yarrow over there...I'll go get it." he said before bounding off that direction. Sure enough he soon found some and started digging up the roots and putting them to the side. He also found some cobwebs. Even though he hated the feel of them he wrapped them around his paws and then put them with the Yarrow. He was about to pick them up and ho back to heather flower when a bright color caught his eyes. The berries were bright red, but they didn't have a scent from what he could tell. He tilted his head and slowly started that way. He had never seen berries like this before on the moor, so they had to grow near the river. as he kept looking at them interest and wonder seemed to hit him. He couldn't name this herb...even if that's what it was. He wondered if he should take this back to Heatherflower or not.
He decided he should, just in case. As he bent his head down to go bite of a stem he heard heatherflwoer run up behind him
"Cloudpaw no!"
He jumped back at her startled yowl. What had he done?[/center]

Show me the meaning of being lonely
Is this the feeling I need to walk with
Tell me why, I can’t be there where you are
There’s something missing in my heart.

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Heatherflower watched with a worried gaze as Cloudpaw trotted off to obey her duties. He was a good apprentice. He would make a wonderful medicine cat one day. Heatherflower's eyes clouded over in worry. She just hoped that day would be anytime soon. She began to pad after her apprentice, barely paying attention to what was going on around her. Her mind was not racing with what was wrong with the clans, but what was wrong with her.

Ever since the battle of RougeBlood Heatherflower has been weak. She knew that something had happened. Had finally clicked into place with her weak immune system that caused her to feel sick like this. Sudden burst of coughing, dizziness when she stood, she had no appetite. If it wasn't for the fact that Cloudpaw always ate with her and would get worried if she didn't eat that Heatherflower ate in the first place.

She was sick, there was no doubt about it. It couldn't spread, and no herbs would ease the cough or help with the dizziness. Heatherflower felt tired and weaker everyday. She didn't want this to happen to her. She didn't want to leave Cloudpaw so young and in-experienced like she had been. She had to fight on, so he would become the best medicine cat he could ever be.

She saw his white form at the top of her down cast eyes. He was looking at something. A bush, with red berries. Heatherflower froze...they were death berries. The she-cat raced toward him screeching at the top of her voice "Cloudpaw! No!"She slid to a stop in front of the frozen form. "Don't you know better! Don't ever touch those berries, or the bush! Those are death berries, they rarely ever grow on the moor! They are poisonous, they can kill a full grown warrior. Three berries and they would be dead in seconds, one berry and the strongest warrior would be near death! Just a drop of their juice could kill a kit! NEVER, EVER touch them!"

Cloudpaw

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Cloudpaw stared at Heatherflower as she started screeching at him about the Death berries. He hadn't known they were that bad. he just thought they were berries. Oh gosh, had he had grabbed one...a shiver when up his spine.
"I'm-I'm sorry Heatherflower. I didn't....i didn't know....I'm sorry...i jsut..." that was all he could stammer out. His eyes were wide with fear, not from maybe getting close to dying but from the fact that he had terrified Heatherflower. She had been so calm just two seconds before, then sudden she was screeching at him. She must not want anything to happen to him.
He dropped his gaze and stared at her paws. What had he been thinking? He should have just left them there and gotten Heatherflower. That would have been the smart thing.
'come on you stupid tom. Think!'
Cloudpaw slowly looked back up at Heatherflower.
"I'm really sorry. I didn't know." he said softly.[/center]

Show me the meaning of being lonely
Is this the feeling I need to walk with
Tell me why, I can’t be there where you are
There’s something missing in my heart.

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Heatherflower caught her tongue and took a deep breath. Calm down Heatherflower, he didn't know. but even so she was still shaking. Cloudpaw could have died right in front of her, and then she didn't know what would happen. Heatherflower took a deep breath and placed her tail on the white tom's shoulder. "I'm sorry Cloudpaw, I shouldn't have gone off like that. It's my fault you didn't know. Death berries rarely grow in the moorland so I never thought you would come across them."

Her eyes glanced over to the stack of herbs he had collected and she felt a rush of pride in her chest. "You did a good job collecting those herbs, come on lets get back to camp." Heatherflower bent over to take half of the stack of herbs. And then she began to head toward the camp.

Thoughts were racing through her head as she walked. Should I tell him I'm sick? No, just wait until he has to know, when you can't hide it any longer. There is no need to worry him any more. He's had a rough time tonight. When the camp came into sight Heatherflower mumbled through the leaves in her mouth "You can go on to bed, I'll put away the herbs and cob webs."

Cloudpaw

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Cloudpaw quietly followed Heatherflower back, not saying a word but picking up a few of the herbs she dropped. As they padded back silently to camp, he thought about how Heatherflower had reacted about the death berries. He understood that she didn't want him to die, but it was more than that. He had caught something in her eyes as she yowled at him, almost like fear or losing something. and as he watched her now, everything about her seemed so calm, as if nothing had happened.
When they reached the camp and the warm Medicine cat den he set the herbs he had with the other quietly then looked at Heatherflwoer as she spoke. He hadn't realized how tired he was until she said something. Now that he thought about it, his eyes were drooping and his legs were starting to give way. He nodded slightly and headed towards his little cavern in the back. He stopped and looked at Heatherflower.
"I'm really sorry. i didn't mean to make you panic..." he murmured softly, then smiled a little. "Maybe we could to some other training tomorrow?"
He left the question in the air and slid into his smaller den. He turned around a few times and got settled before closing his eyes and falling into a deep seep.[/center]

Show me the meaning of being lonely
Is this the feeling I need to walk with
Tell me why, I can’t be there where you are
There’s something missing in my heart.

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Board is done!